11.2.08

Return

Just returned from The Family UK Trip (the UK Family Trip?),I'M all zoned out after nearly or possibly over 24 hours of the journey beginning with the 2-hour bus ride from Milton-Keynes to Heathrow airport,where we numbly complied going through a dozen type of security checks before resigning to the 13-hour flight back home.

The trip was enjoyable,we spent our days driving across places all over UK-Brighton,Bristol,Salisbury,Birmingham,Northampton and a couple more-all with the help of Yat's nifty GPS travel TomTom thingy,which provided us an unprecedented sense of mobility and adventure.Passing beautiful green terrains,quaint fishing villages,the big cities-brushing past a countless nameless faces,emerging from the entire experience with a melancholic heart,a sense of comforting displacement and an unexplained speechlessness that blends too well with my pre-existing detachment from the world.

Sometimes I catch sight of my own reflection on windows,mirrors,sunglasses and see that I'm smiling-immediately the smile drops,replaced by a look of bemusement and wonder (eyebrows furrowed,lips pursed,eyes shot sideways) and I try to discover the roots behind that smile,but let go quickly because I think to myself just let it be.My thoughts wander off my body,I'm a person of spirit and feelings and this body or earth makes little sense sometimes-I think it's a good thing,but that tiny voice of doubt lingers around telling me "no,this is not right"-I am not healed and might never will,but I'm learning to live with the scars.I'm still shit scared,sometimes in the most awkward of times-waiting for a train,I feel my toes sweat-but I march on anyways,the mouth spits out what I think are words carefully strung into comprehensible sentences,and this face contorts accordingly as it laughs and frowns on cue and I project the idea of a brave new person and almost pull off pretending to be the New & Improved Al (More aggreeable!He Blends In like a Potted Plant,and Even Does Your Laundry and Babysits Your Children and Turns to Chocolate so You can Eat Him Once You're Done With Him!Now available in Tesco and all leading Hypermarkets for only $4.99!Buy now before it's sold out!) but then laugh it all off,return to my cynical,dazed,volatile,unapologetic and godknowswhatelse self and instantly feel like I'm not meant to be there,but I'll stay anyway.

This is who I am.Eat this!

So,we have here too many pics for fingers to count-I'll post them in order of how the trip went,whenever I feel like it.We'll start with the flight to UK,views from the plane.The vastness of the universe,something I don't fully understand-and hope to never will.



More to come.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i missed you. :(

Al said...

We'll meet again,soon enough:)